You can dress me up….

Published on Wednesday, January 23, 2008 by Katherine

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..but you can’t take me anywhere!  I was at our annual church Winter Festival, waiting patiently in the buffet line for what looked like absolutely delicious food.  The line split into two so folks could serve themselves from both sides of the tables.  The way the lines were moving, a gentleman across from me seemed to always be at the same station I was throughout the entire self-serve process. My first move was my own fault.  Lumpia has got to be one of my very favorite foods.  But being a “lady,” I certainly didn’t want to embarrass myself by taking more than my share.  So I quietly whispered to my non-lumpia eating son, “Psst!  Sneak a lumpia on your plate and give it to me later!”  He puts one on his plate and then says quite loudly, “Mom, just put it on your plate so I don’t have to give it to you later!”  The man across looked up and gave me a quizzical eye. Then I make it to a multi-tiered platter of cheeses with a smile on my face.  Oh look, pepper cheese on the other side!  So I carefully reach around to select a few choice squares – until my lack of coordination gets the best of me and little blocks of cheese tumble down from plate to plate – until they settle directly in front of the man across from me.  Another look directed my way. And finally, the piece de resistance.  I wanted to add a touch of mustard to my ham sandwich.  So in my mind, I lifted off the top bun in preparation for the mustard.  But in reality, I managed to grab the top in such a way that the bun flew up in the air, did a few somersaults and then ceremoniously landed face down in the middle of a huge bowl of mustard. The gentleman across from me shook his head and walked away.