Women and Vulnerability « Shoot Me Now

Shoot Me NowWomen and Vulnerability

Women and Vulnerability
Published on Tuesday, October 4, 2011 by


Have you ever felt vulnerable, unsafe or sickened by the actions of another?  Sadly, I faced just that yesterday afternoon, leading to not only disbelief but to seething anger as well.  Where do I start?

After work, I picked up my daughter and was on my way home when we stopped at a light.  I noticed some activity in the car next to me and turned to look.  Two young men were attempting to get my attention.

Not wanting to encourage, I looked forward.  It wasn’t until they honked the horn that I glanced back towards their car.

That was when the punk in the passenger seat arched his body and began to unzip his zipper.  As his hand reached for the pants button, he stared directly in to my eyes with a sickening grin on his face.

At that moment, my daughter leaned forward to see what I was looking at.  MY DAUGHTER.  My ten-year-old daughter.

When the idiot realized I had a child in the car he plopped back down and stared ahead.  The light turned green and everyone moved along.   Thank heavens my daughter has no idea what occurred in those brief yet significant moments.

I drove away in complete and utter disbelief.  At that point, the potential implications of this situation had not yet sunk in.  We met up with everyone at home; I changed my clothes and headed off to the gym.

As I started on the elliptical machine, everything began to sink in.  Feelings of rage, fear and resentment flowed through my body.  I increased the incline on the machine and pushed myself harder than ever before.

Indeed, between the weights and machines I carried out the best workout I have ever had in the gym.

As I prepared to head home I felt renewed.  Strong.  Capable.  Until I approached the door and saw I would be walking alone in the dark parking lot to my car.  Security guards were on duty, but this was the latest I had ever left the gym.

Now I just felt angry.  Those lowlifes had been in a car, for heaven’s sake.  I had not been in any immediate danger and there were people all around me.  But I wasn’t the only one in the van.  Those jerks not only made me feel vulnerable, but also placed my child in that very same position.

vulnerable woman

There are great benefits to being a woman, but there are unfortunate downsides as well.  We women are the weaker sex, no?  Generally, men are physically stronger than women are.

fighting army

The key is for women to use not only their power right back in a situation like that, but to use what God has given them naturally as well.

These natural abilities women have?  Mental strength.  Strength to fiercely protect their own children.  Patience to wait until the right moment to strike.  And a great knowledge that can be used during even greater battles.

But how can one feel safe in a world where anything can happen at any time?

Have you, man or woman, been faced with a situation that led you to the feelings I recently experienced?  Or men, have you known a woman who encountered a similar situation?

mom blog

  • Ron

    I got angry just reading this post, Katherine.

    OMG…how horrible! And I’m so sorry to hear that you had to experience this. I see this kind of thing all the time (especially living in a city). I know of many woman who feel the same way – vulnerable. The cat calls, the rude comments and ‘gestures’ that men make to women on the streets. I’ll tell you, if I were a woman and had these same things said and done to me, I’d be furious.

    I tend to disagree that men are stronger than women – even as a man. I truly believe that women are actually stronger than most men. And why?

    Because of what you just shared…

    “These natural abilities women have?  Mental strength.  Strength to fiercely protect their own children.  Patience to wait until the right moment to strike.  And a great knowledge that can be used during even greater battles.”

    Now to me….that’s REAL strength!

    But I also happen to think women are stronger physically too. I mean, have you ever seen a man when he has a simple cold? He acts like a BIG baby – HA!

  • So sorry that happened to you and your daughter.  I’m glad she didn’t know or see anything. Fortunately I have not been a victim of such disgusting behavior. 

  • There are way too many of these sickos out there.  You did well and I’m so glad they he had the sense to quit what he was doing once he realized you had a child in the car.  I’ve worked around these idiots for 25 years.  They don’t care about anyone but themselves.

    Have a terrific day.   🙂

  • holy horrifying. What the hell is wrong with people? I would have been freaked out to leave the gym alone at night too – after almost getting flashed by that asshole in the car. Thank god he didn’t pull it out in front of your daughter. 

  • I recently came across your blog and have been reading posts. I thought I would leave a comment. I don’t know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.

  • This makes me so angry. The guy may not have meant anything sinister by what he was doing (like sexual assault) but he was being an absolute dickhead. I think a lot of men don’t realise how things like this impact on women. It puts us in a position of fear and resentment. I’ve been in similar situations where I have felt unsafe or threatened and it is not pleasant. It really sickens me that some men feel they have a right to act like that around women. But what sickens me more is that they don’t consider the ramifications of an act that to them might be just showing off in front of their friends but to the woman it is directed at, makes her afraid to go out in public on her own.

    I wonder about the mothers of these men because if my son ever did anything like that I would cut his gonads off ( I am only partly joking…) It is completely unacceptable. I am so sorry you had to go through that.

  • Those are terrible moments. I can understand how the anger, and the fear, linger long after.
    I’m glad your daughter didn’t have to experience that, and I’m sorry you did.
    Men! You can’t live with them, and you can’t shoot them!

  • This is so disgusting to read.  I had an “encounter” with a “flasher” when I was about 9 years old.  The police came to my house and I was supposed to tell them in factual language what had transpired.  Okay, the words “penis” etc. were not in my vocabulary at that point in my life.  I had memorized the man’s license plates number on the way home, and apparently he was apprehended.  But what a terrible ordeal for any child to experience.  Or any adult woman for that matter.  I’m so sorry this happened to you and yours!

    • OH MY GOSH!!! At nine you were able to THINK about a license plate and MEMORIZE IT… that is amazing. How horrid, sick and unthinkable that you went through that… I just don’t get some “people” if you can call them that… sick sick sick…. I rejoiced when I read that the ass was apprehended!!!

  • FishHawk

    “Shoot Me Now!” has been included in this weeks A Sunday Drive.  I hope this helps to attract even more new visitors here.


    • Ha ha ! I had forgotten about when my son put his hand in the balloon… funny!!!

  • bad times has come, one cant say what will happen next, the day is not far when each and every person in the world will have to carry a weapon for self defence

  • You should have gotten the license number and called it into police.  Taking action reduces those feelings of vulnerability.  Also, you might have prevented these little bastards from making anyone else feel the way you did.  I’m sorry this happened to you, Katherine, especially with your daughter in the car.

    • Jayne, your comment REALLY struck me. You know what? I never EVER thought about getting the license plate. That NEVER crossed my mind. It was like I was in a state of shock, which is USELESS in a situation like that. I feel horrible not having thought of it. Since that time, I have purchased pepper spray/tear gas/dye all rolled up in one… now I have to burn “license plate” in to my mind. I am so glad you mentioned that!

      • And all you have to do these days is snap a photo of it.   Boom.   You’ve got the make/model/description and license plate.   

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