What to Expect During an MRI

Published on Sunday, July 15, 2012 by Katherine

Two weeks of pain. Time for an MRI, ya think? My very first. I don’t have a lot of those left!

Three different people from the hospital three different times asked, “Are you claustrophobic? “ Perhaps I should have gotten the hint?

I arrived at 7:15 a.m., did the paperwork, had to listen to the stories of the many sexual escapades in the Olympic Village and then Taaaa Daaaa! They called me back.

I had to answer about 30 questions about potential metal pieces in and near my body. Surprisingly, they asked me to leave my shirt on, take off my bra, jewelry and leave everything else on. “What about the metal button on my pants? The metal on my shoes? Why had I been asked so many questions?”

And my big question? Why did they ask me if I have a tattoo?

I was quickly led to the table, got on my back, fit my neck in the holder and dutifully inserted the ear plugs. A mask was placed over my face. “You will hear me inside of the machine, and if you speak REALLY LOUDLY I will hear you too.” What? REALLY LOUDLY? Ummm….

And then they slid me in.

When I opened my eyes, I saw I was encased in a white plastic tube that was just inches from my face. Why am I breathing faster?

Indeed, it’s all a mind game. There is NOTHING to an MRI. No needles, nothing invasive. And who doesn’t appreciate being snuggled up in a horizontal position with nothing better to do than relax and snooze?

But I was actually breathing faster! So my own mind games began. I purposely began to think. It began with “Oh my God, I am heartly sorry….” and continued to menu planning, counting and a bit of Katy Perry running through my head. “Falllllingggg from cloud ninnnneeeeee…..”

All the while, “Bump bump bump bump whirl whirl whirl whirl zzztttt zzztttt zzzttttttttt.”

By the end, I was in one of the tube thingies from The USS Enterprise. “Shuttle craft to Enterprise, Shuttle craft to Enterprise, the MRI is almost complete.” Thanks to Spock, the end of my MRI was just fine, if not entertaining.

Results on Monday or Tuesday. I’m oh so over this pain.

Have you had an MRI? How did you do? Was it a breeze or a complete and utter freak out? Did you ask the test to be stopped? Or did you sleep through the entire thing?