The Demented Tooth Fairy

Published on Tuesday, February 16, 2010 by Katherine

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When I was little, the Tooth Fairy left a quarter under my pillow for each tooth.  And I was happy.  My daughter?  She is not driven by money.  She is touched by things given from the heart.   This is the very reason for the note I found next to her bed this weekend, after she had five teeth pulled out.

Now keep in mind, when I am home, I am never alone.  Elizabeth goes with me everywhere.  Furthermore, there was no way I was going to leave her with anyone while she was still hurting.  So where was the Tooth Fairy going to get these requested items?

It wasn’t until Sunday night that I found an opportunity to score five special things.  I was driving my son home after basketball, planning to stop at Rite Aid for a few little hair and jewelry items.  Unfortunately they were closed.  The only other option was the Walgreens across the street.

I’ve never been to Walgreens before.  To my surprise, there wasn’t a jewelry item in sight.  So I had to do the best I could with what was in front of me.  With a little help from my teenage son, I managed to score five things to go under her pillow.

Rubber glowing worm?  Sure!  He looks special to me!  Squirmles?  Oh YEA, I had one of those when I was young!  Sizzler magnets?  OK, I’m pushing it here, but why not.  Then my son arrives with a pretty nifty yo-yo.  Maybe not her thing, but since he was helping I certainly didn’t want to turn him down.  And was it any worse than that creepy purple glowing guy?

So I was up to four.  Needed one more.  Walking, looking, walking, looking.  NOTHING.  Until I turned the corner and found myself in the As Seen On TV aisle.  And found an item that she and I had wondered at just a few days before.  The Turbo Snake.  SWEET!  Not even thinking twice, I grabbed it and checked out.

OK, so the Tooth Fairy put a drain snake under my daughter’s pillow.  Doesn’t she do that with everyone?  But GET THIS.  It was the first thing Elizabeth squealed at, and was the first thing she opened.  My drains are crystal clear now.  Thanks, Tooth Fairy!