Last Friday my daughter and I had hair appointments.  This is a rare occasion, as money is always an issue.  But hair was big and it was time.  My daughter opted for a super short cut she has been begging for.  Gosh, you wait two boys out to finally get your girl and all she wants to do is cut her hair short.  No bows! No braids!  No ribbons. But that is another story. 

As I was waiting for her hair to be cut I was chit-chatting with the shampoo person.  Girl.  Guy.  Ummm, guy.  (I guess I have to explain that one.  This guy is AWESOME.  He is funny as can be and beautiful.  He wears women’s pants, a tight woman’s top and has the most glorious head of long blonde curls I have ever seen in my life.  I will never forget when my teenage son was having his hair shampooed by this guy and the guy spoke to him in his obviously male voice.  My teenager had thought this guy was a woman.  The shock that only I could see on his face was priceless.  But that is another story.) 

I happened to mention that I would love to have an Instyler while we were talking.  He said, “Oh my goodness, we have one! Do you want to try it!”  ANGELS SINGING!  Yes! Yes! Yes!  “Does it really work?”  “Yup!”  “Does it really gloss your hair?”  “Yup!”  BRING IT ON! 

As I picked up the Instyler, my first thought was, “Wow, this is HEAVY.”  But that immediately passed as I held the golden rotating tool near my frizzy, very non-glossy curls.  Wait. It is backwards.  No, that was right.  Nope, wait, let me turn it around.  OK, that’s good.  Here we go.  Attach.  Gently twist as I pull along my scraggly hair. Release.  ANGELS SINGING.

Ladies and Gentlemen, what I had before me was the most glossy, perfect and smooth curl you have ever seen.  It was EXACTLY like the infomercial.  EXACTLY.  Giddy, I did more.  And more.  And then it was time to get my hair shampooed.  

After I had my haircut, my shampoo friend and I played a bit more.  Gymnastics was 20 minutes away so I only had a second to quickly smooth the top of my hair before I left.  No time to make curls.  But the result was just like the old days when I had time for hot curlers and curling irons – only BETTER and QUICKER and GLOSSIER. 

I cannot end this story without sharing the reactions I received from my family.  My daughter, of course, loved it.  She was amazed at how smooth and pretty my hair could be.  When I got home, without saying a word, I walked in and faced my almost 16 year old son.  Ready for this?  This is NOT an exaggeration.  My son screamed, covered his eyes and yelled, “Noooo!  Nooooo!  Your hair is freaky!   It is so straight!  How could you do that! NOOOOOOOO!”  So much for a bit of change. 

I picked up my 13 year old son later that evening.  Without skipping a beat he jumped in the car, looked over at me and said, “Mom, you look ten years younger!”  This boy will go far with the ladies. 

And finally, my mother smiled kindly as the Instyler story spilled out of my mouth.  And then she gently, EVER so gently, said she had been looking over old photos recently and funny, I resembled pictures taken a long LONG time ago – HIGH SCHOOL pictures…  (Translation: Honey, you look like you just came out of the early 80′s.) Alright, so I would work on the actual hair-do if I ever got an Instyler. 

I have visited http://www.getinstyler.com many times since my trial run with the actual product.  I’ve moved beyond the infomercial and gone directly to the source.  The motherload.  The website.  And then I once again read the price.  I sigh.  Wipe a little tear out of my eye and close my browser.  One day.  One day.

My friend finally purchased the rotisserie.  He said every day he came home from work he would enter his house to the smell of savory, tasty meat.  But the addiction didn’t end at that.  His wife told me weeks later, “I caught my husband watching that infomercial again…” 

Recently, I have become addicted to an infomercial myself.  The InStyler.  I think about it at work.  I think about it at home.  I want that InStyler.  I have curly, kinky hair and according to the infomercial, my hair can be straightened faster than I EVER dreamed possible.  And on top of that, my hair will be polished, shiny and silky!  It’s a miracle! 

It is also more than $100!  Sigh.  Goodbye InStyler.  Goodbye silky, shiny hair.  It just wasn’t meant to be.  But yet I am plagued by it day in and day out.  

I can hear my mother now.  “You wanted the Epilady and swore you would use it.  You got it, and it still sits in your closet, unused!”  Yes, she was right about that.  The Epilady was worse than natural childbirth.  And I’ve been through natural childbirth.  It sits untouched in my hall closet, deadly hair-pulling wires fully intact and functional.  But what my mother doesn’t know is I plan to one day become rich off of that Epilady.  It will be worth millions soon, and Ebay is calling my name.  Mint condition! 

You know… I have another blog that I write reviews in.  Perhaps… do you think…. ?  Perhaps if I contact the InStyler company I can offer a review if they send me the InStyler, free of charge?  You think?  My mind is racing!  Shiny hair!  POLISHED HAIR… I MUST HAVE THAT INSTYLER! 

So I ask you.  What is YOUR infomercial dream?