How Do You Hold On To Your Heaven? « Shoot Me Now

Shoot Me NowHow Do You Hold On To Your Heaven?

How Do You Hold On To Your Heaven?
Published on Sunday, August 16, 2009 by

My heaven is in Corolla.  Do you have a heaven?

In the last few weeks, times have become hard.  School is approaching, which inevitably brings work, stress and more work.  School physicals. Medications.  Doctor’s prescriptions.  New uniforms.  New high school clothes.   All three kids need two pairs of shoes.  Haircuts for the boys.  A few hundred in school supplies, literally.

To top it all off, I am out of money.   Gone.  Goodbye.   Adios.  My brakes are BAD.  That is something that can’t wait, but has to for at least another week or two.  There is no money for food.  I’ve been skipping meals to ensure good lunches for the kids.  Don’t worry, with gastroparesis it isn’t as hard as it sounds.  As of now, payday is after school starts.  So where will the school supplies, school shoes, school clothing and oh yes, school FOOD come from before then?

And the house?  Don’t even go there.

At home I’ve been a bundle of nerves for two weeks.  Like so many other mothers in America, just trying to make ends meet.  I’m not unique in any sense of the word.  But I’m blessed to have a getaway at my disposal.  It isn’t my house.  But I am able to go on weekends during the summer.  And lucky me, it is smack dab in the middle of the most beautiful area I know – the Outer Banks.

After work and gymnastics Friday night comes the drive my car knows best.  It only takes about seven turns during the hour and forty five minute ride and you are there.  As I drive away from my hometown I feel the stress simply melt away.  Near the final turn we roll down the windows to smell the ocean.  And I am in heaven.

Another blessing?  My mother.  She buys and packs all the food.  She lugs it to her car.  She lugs it out.  She checks her list twice, three times.  She lugs it back to the car.  So much work for a few days.

Here, my kids can eat WELL.  Here, my kids hear funny family stories.  They walk where my father used to walk.  They gaze out at nothing but nature.  Fox, deer, sanderlings, bugs of all sorts, pelicans, dolphins, rays, mole crabs and schools of young bluefish.  They spend hours in the healthy sun, surfing, skimming, body boarding and gazing at the ocean.  And best of all, they can enjoy a mother who has nothing but undivided attention for them.  She is calm, sunned, happy and stress-free.

This is the way life should be every day, for everyone.  If we all had a place like this EVERY day, the world would be so much better.  Of course the magic ends all too quickly.  The house is scrubbed, the car is loaded and the weight begins to push on my shoulders as we make our way back.

We all have places we can escape too.  Little bits of heaven around unexpected corners.  Perhaps a perfect picnic spot.  A weekend lake to swim in.  Or just your back yard, with the dog running around happily and the children playing in the sprinkler.

My struggle is to keep my heaven with me when I’m not at the beach.  And as winter approaches, my sunny days seem to fade more and more into what is simply a slight remembrance.  It is all too easy to get caught up in life, isn’t it?  In struggles.  In worries.  In obligations.  Perhaps life is all about finding that heaven within yourself.

Where is your heaven and how do you keep it close?

baby deer in Corolla

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