Slaying Dragons « Shoot Me Now

Shoot Me NowSlaying Dragons

Slaying Dragons
Published on Wednesday, September 7, 2011 by

empty gym

Many of you are aware I suffer from the silent chronic illness, gastroparesis.  Typically, I have good days and bad days because of my paralyzed stomach.

Over the last week, my pain and nausea have spun out of control.  I am still the master of disguise to all who interact with me on a day to day basis.  For many they see the smile, but when their backs are turned the pain is revealed on my face until someone looks again.  And tears?  Yes, I’ve had a few.

But damnit, I’m tough.  (Sometimes.)

Two days ago, however, I decided tough was done.  NO MORE EATING.  For seven days, I had been hungry, ate and then regretted every single bite.  The moment my decision was made, I stopped eating solid food.

On the first day I got through on water, but caved and ate some eggs at the end of the night.  Today I actually managed two protein drinks along with my water.  I felt like a dragon slayer, refusing to fuel the ugly beast inside of me.  You want to cause me pain?  You want to make me sick?  Well you can’t.  Because you have no ammunition.

So two days in to this, guess what I found out?  I discovered that when you work out after a near liquid diet, you begin to pass out.  And you know what else?  You get heart palpitations.

But I found out something else.  I am driven.  I refused to give in.  When I began to feel light headed, I simply stopped for a bit and then got right back to work.  When my heart started to flippy-floppy, I pushed just the tiniest bit more before taking a break.

Smart?  Nahhh.  But today, I fought the dragon.  And I kicked ass.

mom blog

  • Oh none of that sounds good at all.  I am so sorry.  You are way tougher than I am

    • Oh I bet you are plenty tough yourself! We all have our crosses to carry, so to speak! 🙂 I just saw your oreo cupcake post…. I may not be able to eat them but OH BOY do they look great. Might make them for the kids!

  • Ron

    You GO, Katherine!

    Wow…I just read your post on gastropareis. I had no idea what that was. I have a friend in Florida who has been suffering with Crohn’s Disease and it’s challenging too. I can handle all kinds of physical pain, but when it comes to anything with my stomach, I’m a baby.

    You take care, dear lady.

    • I can understand being a baby when it comes to your stomach….. there is NOTHING good about having your stomach hurt, EVER!!!! Crohn’s is horrible too….. the digestive track is a crazy business, that is for sure!!!

  • Good for you.  I can’t imagine a liquid diet, but if you aren’t in pain then why not.  I hope it continues to work for you.

    Have a terrific pain free day.  🙂

    • I have been able to eat a bit this weekend – real food….. I think the few days on liquids helped a lot. Thank you!!!!

  • Girl, I know EXACTLY what you are going through.

    I have done the 7 day liquid-diet  MANY times to get the inflamation and pain in my intestines to go away. And it’s EXTREMELY difficult to function.

    Good luck, hang in there, and feel better SOON!

    xoxoxoxox

    • I KNEW YOU WOULD KNOW EXACTLY WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT. You get it… better than anyone. IT STINKS. Period. 🙁

  • Reading about people with food allergies and stomach/intestinal issues makes me very thankful just to be able to eat.  I can’t imagine being even remotely functional in that condition.  Do take care of yourself.

    • Thank you Linda. My gastro specialist told me at first diagnosis that I would go through the stages of death… he said it would take months… you will go through denial, anger etc… he was absolutely right. It is emotionally difficult to look at food on your plate, HUNGRY, and to think, “In a few minutes this will cause me pain.” But I can live with it and thank heavens I am not worse or have anything else… there are always those so much worse…. so I am grateful.

  • Oh, Katherine! Take care of yourself and I know you’re determined to slay the dragon, but don’t push too hard, okay? Don’t want your body to mutiny on you!! I hope you feel better soon…

    • I think my body has already mutinied. Is that a word? Anyways, you know how I REALLY get it back? Brie. Yup. Of course then it mutinies MORE. LOL! I started taking Align again… it might take up to three months, but that usually helps me. My money situation kept me from taking it, but I am now crying Uncle!!!

  • Good on you. I am really impressed. I need to stop moaning about my IBS and just get on with things. Keep on slaying that dragon!

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