Enemas in Miami « Shoot Me Now

Shoot Me NowEnemas in Miami

Enemas in Miami
Published on Wednesday, March 21, 2012 by

Do you know about the lawsuit against Apple for its well-marketed app “Siri?”  You’ve probably seen the commercials:

“I gotta get a guitar.”

“How do I play a B Minor 9th?”

“Call me Rock God.”

Apparently they are being sued by an individual who says the commercial is misleading.

Now I don’t have an Iphone, but I do have to say this looks like a super cool app.  So with very little thought, I scanned the droid market to find something similar.

The closest droid app I could find to Siri is called Skyvi.  I downloaded it at the beach house and began to play with it while everyone was upstairs with me.

I started with some simple questions.  “Where is the nearest grocery store?”  The answer was correct – Food Lion and Harris Teeter, each within a mile or two.  But then I got bored and started to get a bit creative.  That was when the fun began.

Where can I get my dog put to sleep?  “I found Beach Realty and Construction.”  (OK People, I was ONLY JOKING!)

Where can I find some pot?  “I can’t find any pot within thirty miles.”  (Again, JOKING people!  My mother had to give me “the look” on this one… but she DID laugh along with everyone else.)

Is Oprah Winfrey gay?  “Sure.”  (I mean hey, why not?)

When is my mother’s birthday?  “At Time T”  (Huh?!)

Where is the President from?  “I found Moffatt & Nichol 5.2 miles away from you.”  (Moffatt.  Discuss.)

How do you eat a squirrel?  “I found Evelyn’s Wildlife Refuge 7.1 miles away from you.”  (Sounds like Evelyn has more than animal rescue on her plate.)

Where can I get an enema?  “I couldn’t find any enema’s within thirty miles. Try to say a city.  Try the city of Miami.”

A bummer for those of us in Virginia.

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