I Saw It On Duck Dynasty! « Shoot Me Now

Shoot Me NowI Saw It On Duck Dynasty!

I Saw It On Duck Dynasty!
Published on Wednesday, May 15, 2013 by

It started last weekend at the beach house.  The literal “beginning of the end” for my son.  It had to happen to ONE of my kids, considering my own addiction.  It began with my mother and son’s simple errand run.  A trip to Ace Hardware and then a quick stop at Corolla Dunkin Donuts for iced coffee.  Medium cream only with a turbo shot for her, medium cream, sugar and turbo shot for me.

When they returned, my mother came up the stairs laughing.  “You won’t believe this, but when we got to Dunkin Donuts he asked for a double espresso!”


Me:  What?!

Mom:  He asked for a double espresso!!!  I asked him if he KNEW what a double espresso was and he said, “YES!  I saw it on Duck Dynasty!”


Him:  WHAT?!

Me:  You are going to drink THAT?

Him:  Quit looking at me!

My mother and I STARE at him.

Him:  QUIT LOOKING AT ME… I can’t drink it when you are looking at me!

My mother and I STARE at him.

He brings the cup to his lips.  Takes a nice swallow and freezes.  His face turns gray.  He works to get it down.  I think he stops breathing momentarily.

Me and Mom:  BWAH HA HA HA HA!!  SNORT!

Him:  WHAT?!?!

Mom:  Why don’t you put sugar in it?

Him:  You know how it is when you are going to take a shot and have to brace yourself?  You have to brace yourself even MORE for this!  Wait.  I can put sugar in it?

Me:  Yes, there is sugar syrup in the fridge.

Mom: Shot of WHAT??!

Bottom line, he sugared it up and got it down.  After all, he saw it on Duck Dynasty.

The next day, my mother was on her way to Dunkin Donuts again.  She jokingly turned to my son and asked if he wanted a double espresso.  My son’s eyes lit up.  “Really!?!?”

He got his double espresso.  As seen on Duck Dynasty.

Fast forward three days later.  I get a phone call at work.  “Mom, how do you use this coffee maker thing?”  After picking the phone back up from the floor I exclaimed, “You are going to make COFFEE!?”  Ten minutes of phone instruction on how to set up a percolator (there are no drip coffee makers in MY home) AND three phone calls later, my son drank his first cup of coffee.  Shortly thereafter, I received the following text:



….. and so it begins.

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