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Shoot Me Now

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My Smartphone Is Missing One Important Feature
Published on Thursday, December 2, 2010 by I love my new Samsung Fascinate.  From the Android Apps to the amazing graphics, one would think it has it all.  But sadly, my  smart phone is missing one very important camera feature.  Anti-Dog Blur.  Is there an App for that? ...
How I Love Poor Translations
Published on Tuesday, November 30, 2010 by This paintbrush pack was worth every bit of the whole dollar I spent on it! ...
Yes, the Blood in the Truck Bed is Real
Published on Tuesday, November 2, 2010 by A Halloween Review in Pictures ...
I Give You My… Potato Chip?
Published on Sunday, October 31, 2010 by During our many beach walks, my daughter is constantly finding shells and rocks shaped like hearts. I don’t know how she does it, but I believe it has to do with the true heart inside her.  We will be walking and she will stop, hold up a treasure and say, “Mom? I give you my heart.” Yesterday she had a rare bag of potato chips.  She crunched away in the bac...
The Meanest Halloween Sign EVER!
Published on Saturday, October 30, 2010 by Dear Neighbor, I’ve recently noticed the new fancy sign you placed in your front yard.  I’m writing this letter in response to your really funny sign.  You don’t mind, do you? Having put my elderly sick dog down a month ago, I must admit to shuddering at the “stiff and hard” line.  I’m just sayin’…. I have a new dog now.  Just so you kno...
Heebie Jeebies
Published on Sunday, October 17, 2010 by The heebie jeebies, the willies, the creeps – we’ve all had them.  Whether from a scary movie, a childhood memory or a fear of clowns – most of us have some kind of trigger that can send chills down our spines. I get to see my trigger every October, just a few streets away.  For that is where THE WITCH lives three weeks out of the year. You’ve seen the...
Deranged Crab Performance Art
Published on Saturday, September 25, 2010 by Ah yes, Captain George’s Seafood Restaurant.  Home of the bountiful seafood buffet.  Rows of things with shells, pincers and claws. And the best part about it?  After you are done eating, you can play with your food. MUTANT BATTLE CRAWFISH I WILL DEVOUR YOUR SOUL THERE HAS GOT TO BE A GOOD CAPTION FOR WHAT THAT GUY'S THINKING What do you think he i...
Am I Being Followed?
Published on Saturday, September 11, 2010 by When my mother was packing to leave the beach house on Monday, the renters from the neighboring house stopped her. “Excuse me?  Are you the owner?” “Yes, I am.” “We are early risers.  This morning at about 6 a.m. we saw a reflection on your house that we couldn’t explain.   We took a picture and would like to email it to you.  We looked all a...
Another Weird Thing in my Back Yard
Published on Thursday, August 19, 2010 by The Mysterious Bone Meat.  How can one forget that fateful Christmas dinner?  What was on that bone?  Was it Dora?  Jesus?  Intriguing! Today I have a new one.  I was walking through my backyard and came across this, well, thing.   I picked it up and was stunned at the skull looking back at me.  What the heck WAS this object?  It was round, chalky looking...
Teenage Sleeping Habits
Published on Friday, July 23, 2010 by When they are young, they sleep all snuggled up in their cribs.  A sweet, innocent and beautiful sleep. When they are older they sleep in little boy beds among piles of beloved pets that keep them safe while they slumber. But be forewarned.  Because when they are almost fully grown you play “find the teen” every morning.  Today I found three. ...
Here Comes Peter Cottontail…. Grilled?
Published on Sunday, July 11, 2010 by Let’s get something straight before I begin. This is my rescue rabbit Sunshine. This is NOT my rescue rabbit Sunshine. Again…. Rescue Rabbit Dead Rabbit. Last week my son came to me with his head hanging down, feet shuffling. “Umm, Mom?” “Yes, honey…?” “Uhh, I have a question.” “??” “Can we um…” <shuf...
I Got Me Some Big 80′s Hair.  Jealous?
Published on Thursday, June 10, 2010 by The eighties.  Madonna, Top Gun, Alf and big hair.  It was the era of hair spray, hot rollers and electric crimpers.  I was no stranger to 80's hair, as I recently discovered while going through some old photo albums. Face it.  My hair is big anyways.  So in actuality, 80's Hair was a godsend!  For once in my life, I was IN, baby!  Plug in the hot cu...
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