Imperfection « Shoot Me Now

Shoot Me Now

» Imperfection

Published on Friday, April 24, 2009 by I've held on to this story all week, waiting... debating.  Do I post it?  Is it too gross?  How do I word it?  But the story has snowballed at work to the point where I feel I must share.  Welcome to the official Poop Post.  If you are squeamish, do not read on.  I am fortunate enough to sit in front of a window on the second floor of a five story building....
Out of the Mouths of Babes.. No Wait – Teens!
Published on Tuesday, March 31, 2009 by Last night my teenage son was sitting next to me, looking at something on the computer screen.  I heard him whisper quietly, but with great meaning, "Mom!"  I must have not answered as quickly as he had hoped, because once again, "Psst! MOM!"   "What honey?"  ... silence... pause from the teenager... then, "Mom! You have old lady hands!"  *****crickets chi...
Gorillas Already A Bit Windy..
Published on Tuesday, December 16, 2008 by Brussels Sprouts are packed with Vitamin C and other healthful ingredients.  But to apes, they sure pack a punch in another way!   In Dudley, the Bornean orang-utans often enjoy local veggies in harvest, donated by nearby markets.  Recently, they have been enjoying fresh Brussels Sprouts.  So much so, that they are tooting their horns in celebration of the Bruss...
Doin’ the Bump!
Published on Monday, November 19, 2007 by A memory burned in to my brain.  Seventh grade.  My first dance, held in the cafeteria.  Low lights, disco ball, great music.  Then a boy actually asked me to dance!  Do you remember the song, "The Bump?"  Face it, it was great at the time.... so off we go, weaving through the crowd to the middle of the floor.  "Doin' the bump!" (bump one...)  "Doin' the b...
Mattress Mishap
Published on Friday, November 16, 2007 by OK, so I come by my embarrassing moments honestly.  My mother was recently in a mattress store shopping for a good mattress for the spare bedroom.  As anyone should, she was testing the few she really liked by lying down on them to see which was more comfortable.   Soon, a salesman was walking by with another shopper.  Just as they passed by, my mother rolle...
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