Katherine « Shoot Me Now

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Japanese Translation Gone Wrong!
Published on Thursday, January 31, 2008 by Our family enjoys giving unusual presents – particularly if they come with translated Japanese (or Chinese) instructions. One year we received a toy that had instructions poorly translated from Japanese to English.  Our favorite line was, “Battery Into It.”  From then on, any wonderful gem of a translation we find is now called a “Battery Into It.” Yeste...
You can dress me up….
Published on Wednesday, January 23, 2008 by ..but you can’t take me anywhere!  I was at our annual church Winter Festival, waiting patiently in the buffet line for what looked like absolutely delicious food.  The line split into two so folks could serve themselves from both sides of the tables.  The way the lines were moving, a gentleman across from me seemed to always be at the same station I was througho...
I Performed a CLASSIC!
Published on Saturday, January 12, 2008 by January means basketball for my family.  Between the two boys, we are running to four games a weekend.  Each game is at a different school and is loaded with people. Last week I managed to perform a classic.  Everyone was seated in anticipation of the second half.  My daughter and walked from the bathroom to our seats, at the very end of the gym.  She walked a...
Brown Nosing – 7-11 Coffee Style!
Published on Wednesday, January 2, 2008 by I admit it – I love 7-11 dark mountain roast coffee with a passion. Every day after lunch I pick up a refill cup and drink it at my desk. A few weeks ago I purchased a new 7-11 coffee mug – a really cool one with a wide base and top. After showing it off to a few fellow coffee lovers, I finished up my coffee and ran all around my workplace fixing pc’s and sof...
Great Christmas Shopper Practical Joke!
Published on Wednesday, December 19, 2007 by Yesterday my 14 year old son and I were finishing the last bit of Christmas shopping – something I hate doing in large stores.  I paid no attention to his wandering behind me as I paid.  As we were finally walking out, he began to smile and said, “Mom, watch how many people start to stand in line…”     I turned and saw a light burning brightly at an ...
Polar Express Mishap!
Published on Friday, December 14, 2007 by Not embarrassing for me, but certainly for the Botanical Gardens!  We went to a wonderful event last night with a group of girl scouts that included cocoa, cookies and a reading of The Polar Express.  In the end of this book a boy receives a special bell from Santa.  It can only be heard if you “believe.”   Following the event, we were taken on a tram ride th...
Asleep in the Bleachers, Doritos Style!
Published on Monday, December 3, 2007 by These pictures were taken of my son with my cell phone during a school basketball game.  He had been at a scout campout the previous night, with only one hour of sleep before I picked him up the following day.  Although I strongly suggested it, he didn't take a nap before the day's adventures.  I couldn't understand how he was even moving off of one hour of ...
Revenge Against Your Mean Big Brother!
Published on Thursday, November 29, 2007 by This is more funny than embarrassing, but certainly worth the post!  When I was in high school, my best friend had a teenage brother who would pick on her quite often.  One day, her mother was making liver pate for a party she was attending that evening.  The liver pate was placed in beautiful individual serving bowls and set to chill in the refrigerator.  B...
Is Anybody In There?
Published on Sunday, November 25, 2007 by Over Thanksgiving, we went to my mother's house with my teenage son's friend in tow.  As I was packing today, I went to clean the bathroom and found the door locked.  I knocked and no one answered, so I used an ice pick to jimmy the door open to clean it. Shortly after, my son and his friend came upstairs for a snack.  When they left I noticed the bathroo...
How Do You Burble A Pea?
Published on Thursday, November 22, 2007 by Happy Embarrassing Thanksgiving!  Today at the Thanksgiving dinner table, I remembered my father teaching us to "burble peas" when we were children.  I mentioned it, and was questioned about it by one of our guests.  "How do you do that?"  So in front of everyone (all eating, by the way!) I said, "Well, first you take a pea..."  TOTAL SILENCE. ...
Is That A…..
Published on Wednesday, November 21, 2007 by Predictably, I have a new one every day!  I went to 7-11 to get a cup of amazing 7-11 coffee, and a male co-worker came along to get something as well.  As I was parking, he looked at my dash and said, "Is that a FINGERNAIL on your dash?!" Sure enough, one of my boys had left a nasty fingernail sitting right in the middle of the dash.  As I rolled my eyes he...
Doin’ the Bump!
Published on Monday, November 19, 2007 by A memory burned in to my brain.  Seventh grade.  My first dance, held in the cafeteria.  Low lights, disco ball, great music.  Then a boy actually asked me to dance!  Do you remember the song, "The Bump?"  Face it, it was great at the time.... so off we go, weaving through the crowd to the middle of the floor.  "Doin' the bump!" (bump one...)  "Doin' the b...
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